With apologies to Fuck You, Penguin please accept the following blog for your consideration.
Hey April, I was driving to work this morning and you know what I got hit with? Snow! It's fucking spring! Where was this shit in December and January when I wanted to go skiing?
May is way better then you April. You have nothing to offer. Opening Day? Sucks. Even cliches write you off; April showers bring May flowers. Ha! May pwn3d you.
I don't know from one day to the next whether to wear shorts or put on a fucking ski coat. This awesome tree in my yard just bloomed and now everything is probably gonna die. Thanks April, I've been waiting all year for that tree. Fucker.
Oh yeah, enough with the rain and wind already.
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